In all fairness to Joy, she was a sweetheart. It wasn't her fault that I hated her chirpy, smart and pretty guts!
It had never happened before that another woman came before me in Obi's life other than his mother and 2 sisters. But they lived in Nigeria and were not a threat to me.
I had picked most of Obi's classes. I chose the job at Google of the four job offers he had. In short, Obi ran EVERY major decision by me...and even the minor ones such as what to get the family for Christmas and what cell phone plan to choose. I was his main chick, his right hand woman. I didn't mind him sleeping with all the Kencys of this world. I didn't want meaningless sex with him anyways. I was not threatened by them in the least because, ultimately, when he needed to have meaningful discussions and take decisions, I was the go-to girl. They had physical relationships with Obi while I had an emotional one, which in my book, trumped the physical crap.
The events that became known as "The usurping of Dami" began with Obi and Joy vacationing to Martha's Vineyard...without me and without running it by me. Two nights before they left, I called Obi. It was strange that I hadn't heard from him for a whole week, so I called to catch up. In the middle of conversation, he casually dropped the fact that they were going away.
Obi: Ehen, I even forgot to tell you, we are going to The Vineyard next tomorrow.
Me: Oh Luigi's Vineyard? Awesome. Are you guys going from work?
Obi: No. Not Luigi's. Martha's. Joy and I
Obi: Joy suggested we go because she has never been. Plus I even need a break sef.
Me: So if I hadn't called, I won't even know you were going away? I knew I was being bratty and petulant but I couldn't help myself.
Obi: Come on, Dami. Don't be like that. Listen, we'll all do something when we get back
Me: Look, I have to go. Have a safe trip.
Obi: Joy says h...
I hung up before hearing the end of the sentence. All???? Is he mad? I don't want to do something with her. I don't know that heifer! I fumed to myself. A part of my brain initiated the idea of closely examining why I was feeling betrayed. Afterall, Obi was just a friend. I shut that part of my brain down quickly with the justification that we had a system and this Joy person was disrupting that system with her spontaneity. I decided to let this slide. At the end of the day, it was just a short break to Martha's Vineyard, nothing serious. I consoled myself with the fact that I was sufficiently in-grafted into Obi's life for some chick to be a threat to what I had painstakingly nurtured.
My self confident pep talk was dashed against the rocks of reality when 2 months after the Martha's Vineyard trip, Obi asked Joy to move in with him.
I was inconsolable.
Obi couldn't stand people in his space for long periods of time. His exes spent the night and if they were very lucky, two nights at his place because as he put it "I can't stand pink and frilly crap all over the place". Obi thought girls were messy and often disrespectful of men's spaces.
"Instead of minding their business and leaving things as they met them, they have an irrational urge to 'juuj up' the place. I send them message?" he once lamented to me when one of his exes, Olga, had attempted to surreptitiously install a lava lamp on his bedside table. I was the only girl allowed for a long length of time because I was very respectful of his space and my additions were usually unanimously decided beforehand.
Ergo, Joy moving in was the biggest of deals! Again, my opinion wasn't sought, it wasn't even dropped into a casual conversation. One Saturday morning, as I was enjoying my beauty sleep, Obi called
Obi: Lazy ass, I can't believe you are still in bed. It's 11a.m.
Obi: Wake up jo!
Me: I'm up jare
Obi: Do you feel like some light manual labour?
Obi: Joy is moving in today so I'm on my way to hers to move her stuff. I can swing by and pick you up.
Obi: pretty pwwweeaasseee!!!
Me: NO! *click*
The nerve of this asshole!!!!!!!!!! I couldn't speak for the next couple of minutes. It was like Yokozunna body-slammed my brain! She's moving in? With him?? In his house??? Today????
This. Cannot. Be. Happening. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
I was bedridden for the entire weekend and on Monday, I was asked to go home and take care of my personal issues. I could not function on my job or as a basic human being. It was just impossible to carry on.
I was 31. I had pinned my hopes on a pact which was beginning to look more and more like a fool's gold and by all indication, the pact had met its Waterloo in Joy. I didn't have any other prospects on the horizon. I had brushed them all off, rationalizing that I didn't want to be encumbered when Obi was finally ready to make his move. I just did not know where to even begin to address how awry my life had gone and what to do to set it back on track. Damn!
To be continued...still mulling the story over so you guys can enjoy it. Thanks for reading and enjoying part 1.